Due to recent events (my seizure) i have had to cut back on my meds until I see my psychiatrist again. I take meds for a reason. Of course I do, that is a silly statement. Without the meds I am irritable, angry, bitchy etc. Everything is annoying, nobody can do anything right and I want to just be alone. 24/7.
So without half of the meds i was taking...here I am, bitchy, irritated. i don't want to leave the house. I'm fat. I'm tired. I want to be left alone. I feel like crying or killing someone, which ever comes first. I have a headache by every afternoon.
Thanksgiving is days away and I get to spend 4 days with people I love the most but I know it is going to be hard for me to enjoy them and I know it will be hard for them to enjoy me. I have no idea what to do and my husband doesn't understand. I try explaining things to him and he says I would be happy if I was skinny and we had money. Yes, honey I am sure that when I am skinny and rich I will want to stop pulling my hair out or crying 24/7 because the Christmas lights I put up today don't work or the cobwebs I asked you to take down 3 weeks ago are down but now sitting in piles on the mantle. I am sure i won't want to stab you the next time you take your shoes off in the middle of the living room or throw your coat on the table instead of hanging it anywhere. Yes. I am sure being skinny will make that all go away.
I am mostly writing this as a warning to my family that I am not feeling well. Also, if you know my husband you might try to explain this to him because he doesn't read my blogs and I don't even try to explain my mental well-being to him anymore.
Thanks.
Stay Funny San Diego,
Daya
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Oh my boys.
They are amazing and amazingly ornery.
Wylde persuaded Dayne to put the potty training potty seat on his head this morning. I know he persuaded him because the first words out of his mouth were "Dayne has the toilet seat stuck on his head and I didn't tell him to do it." It took a while to get off and we cut his cheek and ear. As soon as we get it off Dayne says "Never never ever do that again."
Chett and I watched "Grown-ups" this weekend. I told the kids it wasn't appropriate for them and that it was a Mommy and Daddy movie. Chett, however told them it was a really funny movie about peeing in the water and the water turning blue. That part of the movie is at the end... so as we go through stories about there being no tooth fairy, a 4 yr old breastfeeding, half dressed women... and children screaming "I wanna see the blue pee water! I wanna see the blue pee water!!!" I decided I was right and Chett was wrong. Hmmm, his night to read and put the kids to bed. Have fun honey.
Stay Funny San Diego, Daya
Wylde persuaded Dayne to put the potty training potty seat on his head this morning. I know he persuaded him because the first words out of his mouth were "Dayne has the toilet seat stuck on his head and I didn't tell him to do it." It took a while to get off and we cut his cheek and ear. As soon as we get it off Dayne says "Never never ever do that again."
Chett and I watched "Grown-ups" this weekend. I told the kids it wasn't appropriate for them and that it was a Mommy and Daddy movie. Chett, however told them it was a really funny movie about peeing in the water and the water turning blue. That part of the movie is at the end... so as we go through stories about there being no tooth fairy, a 4 yr old breastfeeding, half dressed women... and children screaming "I wanna see the blue pee water! I wanna see the blue pee water!!!" I decided I was right and Chett was wrong. Hmmm, his night to read and put the kids to bed. Have fun honey.
Stay Funny San Diego, Daya
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Dayne Dayne Dayne
I could prolly go on and on and on about him, the funny things he says, etc.
He likes to eat Play dough.
He loves to sing (lately his song of Choice is Lady Gaga "Telephone"). He sings over and over and over again "I'm kinda busy, I'm kinda busy, I'm kinda busy"
When my toaster oven is not in use it sits on a shelf on my island. It is in a great spot for him to play with and since it isn't plugged in, I allow him to play with it. However, when Chett went to use it tonight he found a sock, some old stale bread and a little doll happy meal toy. I may have to keep a closer eye on that.
He also decided today was no shirt day. Sure. Fine. Whatever.
He said at the dinner table tonight he was tired and laid his head on Chetts shoulder. After dinner the kids had bathes and then we put jammies on and the kids went to bed (after not answering questions about what a buzzkill was during the sex scenes of Glee). The boys were both good and quiet and Chett and I knew they were asleep.Yeah right. I need to stop assuming with Dayne and just expect something ornery. He had snuck into Wyldes room and was sitting on Wyldes bed, while Wylde was asleep, and was playing Wylde's leapster.
I watered my Christmas cactus, and it was sitting in my sink. He helped me by drowning it or "watering" my plant some more. I hope it survives...that was my fault for leaving it within reach.
As I was cleaning this morning I hear him say he needs to go pee. Next then he says is that the pee won't come out. Um. WTF. "Dayne, we don't want the pee to come out into your pants anyway! Get into the bathroom and get your pee into the toilet!!!!" So he goes to the bathroom and comes back out and says "It came out!" Yay for small victories!
I went through this with Wylde, men with goatees are grandpas. Since both of the boys' grandpas have goatees it is a universal thing. It is still a little embarrassing though as we walk through a store and Dayne starts yelling, "Papa! Papa! Papa!" and I have to explain how just because he has a goatee doesn't make him his Papa.
Also explaining the hierarchy of family is so difficult! He was telling me today that Kostin (my nephew, his cousin) is awesome and his friend. I told him Kostin was his cousin. He asked if Kostin was my cousin and I said no Kostin is my nephew. So then we talked KyElle (my neice, his cousin) and how Mema Jojo is my mom and his grandma and then it got confusing to talk about how Daynes Dad's Dad is Papa Richard and so on. Finally I just resigned and said we were all friends and that it was time to nap!
He also decided today that he wanted to talk about boobies and "nickles" or nipples. Since he was shirtless he wanted to talk about his boobies. I told him women had boobies but men and boys have a chest. So then he wanted to discuss "nickles". Yes, mommy has nickles. Yes daddy has nickles. Yes Mema has nickles. Everyone has nickles. Yes Mommy has boobies. No daddy doesn't have boobies. Yes, Mema has boobies. No Papa has a chest, well...okay, he kinda has boobies.
Stay Funny San Diego, Daya
He likes to eat Play dough.
He loves to sing (lately his song of Choice is Lady Gaga "Telephone"). He sings over and over and over again "I'm kinda busy, I'm kinda busy, I'm kinda busy"
When my toaster oven is not in use it sits on a shelf on my island. It is in a great spot for him to play with and since it isn't plugged in, I allow him to play with it. However, when Chett went to use it tonight he found a sock, some old stale bread and a little doll happy meal toy. I may have to keep a closer eye on that.
He also decided today was no shirt day. Sure. Fine. Whatever.
He said at the dinner table tonight he was tired and laid his head on Chetts shoulder. After dinner the kids had bathes and then we put jammies on and the kids went to bed (after not answering questions about what a buzzkill was during the sex scenes of Glee). The boys were both good and quiet and Chett and I knew they were asleep.Yeah right. I need to stop assuming with Dayne and just expect something ornery. He had snuck into Wyldes room and was sitting on Wyldes bed, while Wylde was asleep, and was playing Wylde's leapster.
I watered my Christmas cactus, and it was sitting in my sink. He helped me by drowning it or "watering" my plant some more. I hope it survives...that was my fault for leaving it within reach.
As I was cleaning this morning I hear him say he needs to go pee. Next then he says is that the pee won't come out. Um. WTF. "Dayne, we don't want the pee to come out into your pants anyway! Get into the bathroom and get your pee into the toilet!!!!" So he goes to the bathroom and comes back out and says "It came out!" Yay for small victories!
I went through this with Wylde, men with goatees are grandpas. Since both of the boys' grandpas have goatees it is a universal thing. It is still a little embarrassing though as we walk through a store and Dayne starts yelling, "Papa! Papa! Papa!" and I have to explain how just because he has a goatee doesn't make him his Papa.
Also explaining the hierarchy of family is so difficult! He was telling me today that Kostin (my nephew, his cousin) is awesome and his friend. I told him Kostin was his cousin. He asked if Kostin was my cousin and I said no Kostin is my nephew. So then we talked KyElle (my neice, his cousin) and how Mema Jojo is my mom and his grandma and then it got confusing to talk about how Daynes Dad's Dad is Papa Richard and so on. Finally I just resigned and said we were all friends and that it was time to nap!
He also decided today that he wanted to talk about boobies and "nickles" or nipples. Since he was shirtless he wanted to talk about his boobies. I told him women had boobies but men and boys have a chest. So then he wanted to discuss "nickles". Yes, mommy has nickles. Yes daddy has nickles. Yes Mema has nickles. Everyone has nickles. Yes Mommy has boobies. No daddy doesn't have boobies. Yes, Mema has boobies. No Papa has a chest, well...okay, he kinda has boobies.
Stay Funny San Diego, Daya
Not ever?
Since my "incident" Wylde has tried to be extra helpful. Which doesn't help me at all. He comes out of the bathroom today to tell me that I won't ever have to clean the bathroom sink ever again. He cleaned it so good it was squeaky (with toothpaste). He has also taken to rubbing my arm and being nicer to his brother. His rubbing my arm, is creepy. I have asked him to stop, please make him stop.
Stay Funny San Diego, Daya
Stay Funny San Diego, Daya
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Don't eat that!
As we were visiting family the other day I told Dayne "We are going to meet Papa Richard for lunch." Daynes says, "We're going to EAT PAPA for lunch???"
I say "Nonononono, We are going to go to the same place Papa is and sit with him and eat our lunch together!"
Stay Funny San Diego, Daya
I say "Nonononono, We are going to go to the same place Papa is and sit with him and eat our lunch together!"
Stay Funny San Diego, Daya
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
He is so dramatic!!
I LOVE my son! He was amazing when I got sick this past week. However, he can be a little dramatic about it!! I have heard him say that I had a heart attack. I have heard him say allergic reaction. I have heard him say I was bleeding out of my nose, eyes and mouth. (I think it was just my mouth - from biting my tongue). I can only imagine what his teacher and classmates think happened!!!
When I was home and he was going to bed, he gave me a big hug and said "I'm glad you're okay Mom, but don't ever do that again cuz you really freaked me out!" I sure hope it never happens again! To him or me!!
Stay Funny San Diego, Daya
When I was home and he was going to bed, he gave me a big hug and said "I'm glad you're okay Mom, but don't ever do that again cuz you really freaked me out!" I sure hope it never happens again! To him or me!!
Stay Funny San Diego, Daya
Really? Seriously? I'm kicking my own ass!
Apparently my body has an expiration date and it is slowly expiring! I think I am doing good by getting my flu mist vaccination. However, an hour later I have a seizure at Kohls; causing me to bite my tongue, hit my head and dislocate my shoulder. Then while I am at the primary care physicians office, she finds a heart murmur. Today I spent the morning getting an MRI of my shoulder and head, and pulled a muscle in my thigh getting up from the table.
I am scared to move, I might break a hip next time. I better go back to the Dr and check for diverticulitis! If this is the way aging is going to go from here on out I don't think I like it. Heck, i don't think I will make it very long if I continue on this path.
Okay, that's not funny. Surely this is all some sort of fluke. Maybe this is my bodies way of saying - "Hey, fat ass!!! Go ahead and have another donut! It's okay we can handle it! NOT!"
Stay Funny San Diego, Daya
I am scared to move, I might break a hip next time. I better go back to the Dr and check for diverticulitis! If this is the way aging is going to go from here on out I don't think I like it. Heck, i don't think I will make it very long if I continue on this path.
Okay, that's not funny. Surely this is all some sort of fluke. Maybe this is my bodies way of saying - "Hey, fat ass!!! Go ahead and have another donut! It's okay we can handle it! NOT!"
Stay Funny San Diego, Daya
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