Let me just say.... I wrote my depressing blog so that it may help someone else who was suffering and also it helps to talk out ones feelings. I had no idea that I would be helped out so much by everyone else! The mass amounts of support and flattery were immense and felt deeply! It helped me come to the conclusion that everyone has feelings and everyone has the capability to feel sad and depressed. People skinnier than me, richer than me etc have felt depressed and honestly I didn't know that was possible. I was feeling guilty for being depressed because I have a nice house, I have a supportive and loving family, I have a husband that tells me often how beautiful I am. I no longer feel guilty. I bet at least 80% of the population have felt depressed and contemplated self harm. What's good is that I can talk about it, that i am getting help and with the help of my family (facebook family included) and friends, I now have optimism again that being "happy" isn't out of the question.
I do feel guilty for causing so much sadness and confusion. Everyone has low points and I am sure I hit rock bottom. However, I think my journey to the bottom was short. I feel like half of my month is spent battling depression but the other half I feel more myself. I need to figure out what works for me and that in itself will be a journey with ups and downs!
My husband has realized that depression is serious. I hope that his current behavior and attitude are not short lived. I appreciate all his hugs and reassurance. I hope also that my honesty and openess positively affects my children. Wylde has been emotional and self depricating of late and I fear that it is in response to my depression. He and I are going to seek the help of a therapist together. I think nothing but health and happiness can result in doing that together.
I am also paying more attention to myself. These passed few days I have been able to tell when I need a break, take a deep breath, get out of the house. I have been more motivated. I wore an outfit chett thought was "fruity" because I liked it. I didn't care what he or anyone else thought. I did things for me, that I wanted to do for myself. It feels awesome.
Hello, My name is Daya and I suffer from Depression. Whoopty do.
Merry Everything,
Daya
1 comment:
I love it girl. Been there too many times and I'm here to tell you it does get better. Just know I'm here when and if you ever need a friend. I would love to get together again after the craziness of this crappy year in over. My hubby is coming home for good on the 30th WOOT WOOT!!!!! Maybe the 4 of us can get out and blow the stink off together.
I hope you and your family have a Very Merry Christmas. Here's to 2011 bringing much needed happiness to all!
Hello, my name is Jennifer and I suffer from deppression, but I will beat it down with a bat and then kick it when it's down.
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